thursday it is

aku ingin egois saat ini, tidak beralasan
kalau saja kau mengerti
nanti kau akan mengerti

sementara ini aku akan mencari alasan
mungkin bukan yang kau kira, satu hal sederhana
jangan khawatir, hal ini tidak akan sering

me, she, writings

i wrote,
i may not reply your messages right away
i may not be always there for you
i will not buy you things you don't need
i can not be a funny guy all the time
i will not keep you dry on rain
i may lied to you

but i will call you whenever you are alone
i will spare my shoulder for you to lean
i will tell lame jokes when I've run out the good one
i will try singing a song even my voice is not that good
i will be running in rain with you

she writes,
I'm telling you
most of the time i could be inexplicably impatient
but it because i barely feel safe
and i am afraid of the world around

lies are so intolerable

i don't wanna things you could buy
i just want a trust, a guarantee
so i could learn to trust once again
then i would smile,
without pain to bear no more

i know you are not that funny
but sure i can make us laugh hard
if you don't sing, then i would

yes, i will cry on your shoulder sometimes
but i promise it wont happen too often

just promise me you will keep your words and help me to put trust on you
cause i had enough crying and those stuff

ps:
:)

rarieut

hilang orientasi waktu, tidak bisa berpikir
kepala berat oleh massa yang tidak tampak
jantung berdetak sekenanya
hidung meler hingga mati rasa
serta nyamuk nyamuk biadab itu

perasaan mengambang yang sangat amat tidak nyaman
aku butuh obat penenang

because i can't

"i'm fine" you said
i hardly believe it

please shout "leave me alone" if that's what you really need
I'll go far by then,
cause i cant reach you to hold you tight

distant tunnel

you was the light at the end of the tunnel,
a daydream where i could whispers words to your ears
distant light, cause there's distance you've spelt

today i wont dream no more,
i am afraid and you are ignorant

hey, mahasiswa tidak manja
keraskan hatimu

-sahutan kepada diri sendiri

wide view from heights

if i had a camera, i would had shoot on bw films
because it's the world are, maybe less most of the time

unheard help request

tired cursing life
cant afford anesthetic of affection
lost between tomorrow and today

bail me out
god, psychopath, serial killer, drunk driver,
anything

today is death day for stupid people

drown on thought
measly sane, just suggestive thinking
viewing on third eye view
fading like spirits

dead brain inside
i'm running out of life batteries